Thursday, 5 January 2012

A 21 Year Old Who Dared To Watch 6 "ASYLUM STUDIO'S" Movies Back-To-Back

                                                                     MAD,INSANE,CRAZY,CHEESY,LUNATIC,STUPID,IDIOTIC,MOONSTRUCK just give the name the "ASYLUM" has got it all....from Train Swallowing Snakes To Zombie Tigers...From Unbelievevable CGI to Methodist Acting....Everything at One stop the "Asylum Studios".....
                                         So That was a little bit of respect to the studios that brings us movies which come with a tagline "Never before & most probably never after" and the 21 year old Dare-Devil Yes that was me.Reason?? Ummmm....I Dunno better ask Robert the "Tire" from RUBBER..and if i just broke any kind of a record please let me know about it:) (and the bad editing was just soo Asylumly Intentional)

Plot:Pythons and Aligators are on drugs!!!!!!!! Drugs that were stuffed in chicken!!!!!!A Range officer Stuffs those Drugs in the chicken!!!!!!!!! Wait a minute there is an other sub-plot in the movie "a cat-fight" in a swamp!!!!!!!!!!!Python swallows a Train,the gaitor destroys a mall!!!!!!!!!!! THE END.
Cast:Tiffany plays the Range officer,Deborah Gibson as an animal activists,a bunch of pythons & a bunch gaitors.
The Movie: So you got two of the famous pop-icons from the 80's involved in a "cat-fight" for the whole movie n some gigantic pythons & gaitors all over the screen,it's more of a "Debbie vs Tiffany" than what the title suggests.The movie is not a big-budget let down it's just cheesy fun and a great pass time when you got nothing better to do.So if you like watching movies that are seriously dumb don't miss it.Worth a watch.

The Virus Has spread,Zombies took over the world,There are a bunch of people who survived(because they did'n have brains...which we realize after around 5 minutes through the movie),they run ,they talk,they argue about the terminology of "zombies" & "undead",they cry,they kill zombies,they die.THE END OF CINEMATIC TORTURE!!!
Cast:Ving Rhames ,a guy who looks like ben affleck and some bad actors probably thrown out of high school.
The Movie:This movie is bad,so bad that it's not even funny or dumb,Ving Rhames plays "THOR" killing zombies with a hammer reprising his role from "DAWN OF THE DEAD",there is a girl who looks like she has a bad hangover,a gay looking boy,ben affleck look-a-alike and some people with bows & arrows.The CGI is so bad that even a 5 year old can say that it's fake.The budget was so low even a car that was burning was made with bad graphics.THE BEST PART of the movie is the "TIGER ZOMBIE" which shows up in the end.That's innovative!!! i juz loved it.But seriously Asylum should stop Embarrassing Zombies like this.

.MEGA SHARK VS GIANT OCTOPUS:Plot:400 millions years ago a mega shark & a gaint octopus were frozen in some glacier while they were having a fight for the "world heavy weight championship" and they are back in action because a lunatic in a chopper dropped a package into the water.Debbie Gibson is back in action with a Weird  Japanese guy to slay the pre-historic monsters.Cast:Deborah Gibson,Lorenzo lamas,a weird japanese guy,a mega shark and a cameo by the Giant Octopus.The Movie:The Mega shark steals the show...the real winner of the mega series by the Aylum...the scene where he destroys a plane priceless!!!!splendiforious!!!!Bravo!!!!!If sharks watched movies the mega shark could have been named as the "clint eastwood" of the shark community.The Squid(Octopus, yes there is an arguement about the terminology in the movie) is just a harmless character which shows up only twice...& the CGI and the remaining movie was so good that i cried in the end after the "title re-match" between the CGI monsters.

.MEGA-PIRANHAPlot:Piranha's assasin a US official guy or something,which is taken as a terrorist attack,JCVD from Universal Soilder is on the mission to slove the mystery behind the death..There a group of american scientists.........the Piranha's start growin in size and the ending watch it for yourselves.Cast:Tiffany,Paul Logan,Bryan Williams and some Eco-Friendly Piranha's.The Movie:Probably the best of the six movies i viewed....The sepia screen was good...the CGI was't that bad either...the acting was okay....and the Piranha's WoW!!!!! They are so big that they start popping out of the ocean water(yes they can survive in ocean water & they have a pair of hearts) and destroy the whole city.This is the best Asylum movie i ever's's's incredibly dumb &it's fun.

Whatese????It's the same CGI crapfest again...the mega shark is back to face a tough enemy this time...The crocosaurus.
The Movie:Skip everything except for the last 20 minutes..the "Hell In The Cell" match for the world Championship beteen the 5000 pound Crock the "concrete" saurus and the 4000 pound "Mega" the Shark.They keep biting each other tails for the whole time around 10 minutes and they finally end-up dying Biting their tails.Their Bonding is "God-Made"

Plot:Independence day" meets "Xena" meets "The Thing"
Cast:Seriously Anonymous!!!I recognized the girl who played Xena as the girl Who played RED SONJA in ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE.
The Movie:This movie is Crap..this movie is "nucking futs" it's isn't funny,wait a minute funny???? i was angry..this the worst film ever-made..if there is one yet to come i wish the aliens invaded my home abd have abducted me..seriously Crap!!!

                       Hope Atleast One of You Have Read The Whole stuff.Sorry for the Bad-English:)


  1. seen 3 of them (Mega Piranha, Mega Shark 1 & 2) and understand what you've been through LOL
    All dumb but in some weird way kinda entertaining :)